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He Doesn't Celebrate Valentine's Day

by Lisa K. Stephenson

Photo by Secret Garden from Pexels


What is Valentine’s Day? St. Valentine’s Day is a holiday designed for lovers to express their affection with greetings and gifts. But for some lovers, it could simply mean an argument. “I don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day because it’s a man-made holiday.” Have you heard this before? I have. But what does it mean exactly and should we as women grow worried when our mate utters these tragic and confusing words? Perhaps.


While it may be safe to say that the holiday is simply a marketing ploy to earn a business more sales following that of Black Friday and Christmas – it all comes down to one thing, compromise. One user wrote, “I’ve never had a good Valentine’s Day. I’ve either been cheated on, dumped, or just alone on February 14th. My boyfriend has made it clear he plans on doing nothing on Valentine’s even though I’ve told him this…” and she goes on to mention that while she understands it’s just another day she would like to be able to talk to him about it.

When it comes to particular holidays and relationships, it all comes down to learning how to accommodate one another. It is safe to agree with your partner in acknowledging that this is just another day, but to make things right, he should still look to spend the day with you, have a cheap night in, watching streaming platforms like Netflix and Hulu to name a few.



When two people enter into a relationship they do so with the comfortability of knowing they are there for one another – good, bad, ugly. The best way to overcome any problem is to communicate and find a common ground. In my experience, there was no common ground. I opted for the cheap night in and asked for a hug to which I was hatefully ignored and told, “Well, I do not want to come by or wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day because I know you’re just going to want more than that.”


Yes, a man said this to me…sad, I know. But fear not because maybe the man you’re in a relationship with or dating isn’t like the aforementioned piece of shit. Mature men who are capable of carrying on civilized and healthy relationships should be able to listen to you and meet you halfway when it comes to your needs in the relationship.


WHAT DO WE SUGGEST?

Tell him it is important to you and you would be open to celebrating, but not in a material way. Romantic gestures do not always involve spending money—a handwritten card, cuddling, cooking dinner at home are all some options that can be explained to him with grace and kindness. Men respond well in a calm and controlled environment, so you absolutely must not freak out and begin to behave belligerently. Understand his point of view and try to find a solution to this problem, together.



WHAT ABOUT THE ROMANCE?

Is the romance in your relationship alive and well? Or do you feel stifled and like it’s lagging a bit? Oftentimes when women make a big deal about Valentine’s Day it is because other areas in the relationship need some resuscitating. Maybe it’s sex or just little things that you both used to do for one another that is now nonexistent. If you’re just looking to spice things back up, fear not, below are some amazing finds that can help to sprinkle a little love on your relationship this Valentine’s Day.

 

AURORA | pink aventurine pleasure wand (Retail: $189.00): AURORA is one of those wands that your heart & yoni will always remember. Her essence is gentle, sweet, slow, and feminine like ocean ripples.


She’s here to celebrate your sensuality; constantly reminding you of your infinite potential in the universe.


Aurora’s design is simple, curved, & delicate. Her lusciousness and pleasure are a MUST in your wand collection. She’ll build a relationship with all parts of your body, bringing sensual love to the vaginal entrance, g-spot, & cervix. Aurora is known for creating more self-love, radiance, healing, & expansion. She’s great for re-learning how to self-pleasure & tap into your orgasmic nature.

 

Lift-off Lubricant (Retail: $30.00): Meet Ground Control, Naternal's baby brother, the place where we go play. Manufactured by Root Bioscience.


Introducing Lift Off CBD Lube by Ground Control. With 600mg of Full Spectrum CBD per 2oz bottle, use Lift Off to promote sexual wellness.


With an easy to dispense, pump top, you can be sure to always be ready a good time.

For a limited time only, shop Ground Control CBD Lubricant on the Naternal site. To view Ground Control's entire collection, visit their store online at www.groundcontrol420.com.

 

Slip this fingertip vibrator on to give your partner the best of all worlds: extra stimulation from the hot vibes, and the touch of your hand.


This sex toy is unique and gives couples the ability to stay intimately connected and is a great way to introduce an accessory for the couple looking to spice things up, without making things too impersonal.


 

What is JoyAmo Jewelry and why are we in love with them? JoyAmo is a one stop shop for all of our jewelry needs and on top of that, quality jewelry. "JoyAmo delivers superb products with a twist of coolness." Some of our editors here at She's SINGLE had a chance to try some items from this line and here's what we know...the items do not change color in the shower and can be worn throughout the day with no irritation on the skin. The jewelry can be personalized to your liking - your name, initials and even tender words like, 'Love' to show your partner how you're feeling.

If your significant other is not up for a romantic gift exchange this Valentine's Day, JoyAmo has a plethora of other options available. Personalized jewelry for him or her are a staple and can be gifted anytime during the year. For romantic gifts from the heart, gifts for mom, or gifts in general, here at She's SINGLE, we recommend JoyAmo. Visit their About Us page to learn more.







With a 400 ml capacity and state of the art wave diffusion technology, the Pure Daily Care Diffuser is able to atomize essential oils for ultimate wellness.


It includes 7 ambient light modes with two intensity settings for 14 different light combinations. It also includes 4 timer settings and a convenient auto shutoff feature for low water levels. Made of BPA free plastic with a beautiful, printed wood grain design.


The essential oils are formulated using high quality plants sourced from various regions of the world, such as lavender from France and Tea Tree from Australia. The modern heat-less diffuser delivers the therapeutic properties of these plant oils as nature intended by using modern ultrasonic waves to atomize the oils instead of burning them with heat. Also available on Amazon - check out those almost 40,000 reviews!

 

Calming Essentials Kit (Retail: $66.50): Experience the calming power of this vegan skincare kit. Featuring the ultra-calming toner and hydra surge moisturizer, our calming essentials kit effectively calms and hydrates your skin for a balanced, radiant complexion.


The pair is infused with ingredients like vitamin B complex, cica extract and rosemary leaf water and oil to alleviate redness, replenish moisture, protect the skin barrier and improve tone and texture. Your skin will appear brighter, firmer and more refreshed with this calming essential kit.

 

Comfort your senses with their creamy and warm vanilla Shea Butter Body Cream. Beurre's natural formula features intentionally paired oils that are known for reviving and nourishing the skin.


Infused with enchanted rose geranium carefully cultivated from Lancaster Farmacy in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, this cream with elderflower essence and uplifting Lemon Verbena creates a euphoric effect.

 

Whether your boyfriend is into these little games or not, the most important thing is communicating to him why such a day is significant to you in the first place, adding that you wish there were more romance in the relationship. The trade-off: he can show you his appreciation regularly vs just one day (this is the better deal) and if he can’t keep up his end of the bargain then celebrate Valentine’s Day with a different boyfriend.


Another option for couples with a bit more history is simply to take this day to be kind to one another. Take Valentine’s Day as your “Partner Day” and resolve any conflicts that may be pressing in your relationship, discuss each other’s wants and needs thoroughly, ask your partner if there is anything he would like more of from the relationship.


Get to know one another again, make each other laugh and promise to have no quarrels on this day no matter how big or small. This can be something you both work on looking forward to and can do wonders for building your relationship and making it stronger than it was before.


The celebration of Valentine’s Day or the lack thereof doesn’t have to be the end-all, be-all of your romantic bliss, but most importantly see how well your partner listens and takes your feelings into account. If he is a selfish lover like the asshole I mentioned earlier, run, run away as fast as you can because I can promise you it will only get worse.


Have a great Valentine’s Day!

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