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How to Act Around a Guy Who Rejected You

by Megan Sheckells


Photo by Alex Green from Pexels


Rejection. That word has a way of hitting us like a brick wall, pulled up out of nowhere. The most unfortunate part is as much as rejection can hurt, we all reject someone or something at some time in our life. It is one of those facts of life, but knowing that doesn’t make the experience any more enjoyable.

Someone saying no to us, especially when it is on romantic terms is difficult. This is especially so because it requires a lot of vulnerability, and often a lot to build up to even asking someone out in the first place. So, when they give us that ‘no’, even if it’s a polite rejection, it is a hurt unlike any other. I’ve been on the giving and receiving end of rejection, multiple times. Neither position is comfortable, but rejection is a part of getting what you want. Like the old saying goes: if you never ask the answer is always no.

So maybe you’ve been crushing on this guy for a while, and are so wrapped up in this crush that even your closest friends are giving you trouble for not shooting your shot yet. You work up all your courage and confess your feelings only to be told something like “I don’t see you like that”, or “I’m not interested.” Your heart sinks but the worst of it is just beginning because now your ego is bruised and you have to prepare for future interactions.

If this is anything close to your experience, know that you aren’t alone. You would be hard-pressed to find anyone who hasn’t faced rejection, and if they haven’t it might have something to do with not putting themselves out there in the first place. Luckily there are sources to turn to, to navigate life around this person after the rejection.

Jessica Alderson is CEO and Co-founder of the dating app So Synced, an app that matches people by Myers-Briggs personality types. Jessica offered some insight into how to deal with rejection, she stated, “Maintaining a positive mindset is the key to maintaining your dignity after being rejected. It's important to remember that it's not a personal attack, it's simply that you aren't compatible.”

She is right, it can feel just like a personal attack, but it’s important to understand that everyone is unique. If you look at the rejection through this lens—as hard as that can be at times—you will be able to act maturely in your future interactions following the rejection.


Alderson went on to advise that, “The act of being rejected doesn't define you as a person but how you deal with it does. The most successful people are the ones who bounce back and aren't afraid to put themselves out there again. You can even view rejection as a positive. Every 'no' you hear gets you closer to where you want to be.” This is important because someone saying ‘no’ to us saves us from potentially starting a relationship with an incompatible individual.

Nikolina Jeric, Co-founder of also offered some pertinent advice regarding rejection. She urged people to, “Accept it. Just as you’re not attracted to somebody else, it’s completely possible for people to not be attracted to you, too. This does not mean you’re ugly or flawed—if such a thing even exists—it just means that you cannot force the attraction and you’re not entitled to some person.” This makes a lot of sense. Would you want someone to take your rejection hard? Chances are the answer is no.

With that, it seems the best thing we can do is accept the truth gracefully. Doing so in this manner helps relieve some of the tension when you interact again, and soon the rejection is long gone and in the past. Making a big deal of rejection when you see someone again later down the road just makes it uncomfortable for everyone. And the odds are they feel just as uncomfortable about having had to let you down or reject you in the first place.

If this isn’t the case, you deserve better anyway. At the end of the day, we all just want to be treated with respect and compassion. So just show up as you are, and allow them to do the same. Just because there’s no relationship attraction doesn’t have to mean you can’t still have a great and fulfilling platonic/cordial relationship.


Alderson, Jessica. Personal Interview, 20 Jul. 2021

Jeric, Nikolina. Personal Interview, 20 Jul. 2021.


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