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Signs Of A Feminine Man

by Danielle Wright & Lisa K. Stephenson

I think it's safe to say that every woman wants a man who is in touch with his feminine side—I know I do.

But how does that differentiate from a hyper-feminine man? Believe it or not, there’s a way to spot the difference because yes, there are in fact differences.


When a man operates from his masculinity regularly it can feel difficult to get him to express his emotions or share his story with you. Make no mistake, however, it is possible and it will feel amazing when he does. This kind of vulnerability from a man can strengthen your relationship.


I know, you are probably wondering, “Well, isn’t that what a feminine man will do?” The answer is yes, [but] a man who is operating in his feminine more so than his masculine can be problematic for a woman who is operating in her feminine and not her masculine.

So what do we mean? Men who are hyperfeminine have no problem:


LETTING HIS WOMAN FOOT THE BILL – Occasionally, yes, every man wants to be catered to. But, no man is going to expect his woman to court him aka wine and dine him every weekend. A man asking you for flowers or throwing a tantrum because you did not take him out for dinner on Valentine’s Day is a man operating in his hyper-feminine energy. Please, run. Adding to this, they are usually in competition with their women.


MR. FAST PACED – He’s not trying to take things slow, he’s already spilling the beans from family to friends within two weeks of knowing you. He is not serious about building a connection. This man is more than likely counting dates, rushing intimacy, and making you feel bad for not liking him as quickly as he “likes you”. Yes, you want a man who is obsessed with you and worships the ground you walk on, but masculine men take their time, they are cautious of the people they meet, especially those who value quality over quantity.


SOCIAL MEDIA VALIDATION – Does he follow a plethora of women? Do you find him in a lot of their likes and comments? Chances are he’s a hyper-feminine man. He will take advantage of you—not only in the bedroom but financially as well. Mainly you want to look out for him posting a ton of selfies. Men who post selfies can have some narcissistic tendencies as they look down into the camera—usually a sign that they look down on women. Or, the man who holds the camera upright to catch his ‘angles’. Please, run. He may [look] masculine, but at his core, this is a man operating from his hyper-feminine side.


LACK OF PROTECTION – When you’re walking alongside him does he follow the sidewalk rule? If not, you’re most likely dealing with a hyper-feminine man.


I have a story: I once dated a hyper-feminine man and a masculine man around the same time. Both on different occasions spent time with me in my home—overnight. My front door would not lock properly. I was asleep and one man did not leave until he was able to secure my door shut, ensuring my safety. He then offered to come back with his tools to fix it.


The other simply left my door swinging wide open as I slept. Anything could have happened to me. I know you can tell which one was in his masculine and which was in his feminine. Needless to say, you want a man who is going to protect you and see to it that your safety matters. Hyperfeminine men do not care about you, they only care about themselves.


LACK OF INITIATION – FEAR OF REJECTION – This is common. Dating apps are made up of mostly men according to research. What does this tell us? Hyperfeminine men are more confident meeting women online because it takes the pressure off of finding and meeting one in person. Not to say people have not found love via dating apps, of course, they have. But we hear more horror stories than happy endings. The overall consensus is that men have a fear of rejection which will translate to other areas of their lives—not just being man enough to approach you in public.



He may be someone who will not take the lead most of the time, leave you to do the heavy lifting and heaven forbid you get into an argument and are at a stalemate, he will not reach out first. That will be on you my dear and then you enter, the runner-chaser dynamic. You are no longer the prize in that relationship and the more you go back, the worse he will treat you.

So where did these men come from all of a sudden? A group of men raised by their mothers who are used to seeing women do it all without complaint, now have YouTube channels. It’s the blind leading the blind. We are by no means blaming single mothers, absolutely not! We’re more appalled by the fact that men are so comfortable creating broken homes and leaving women to raise men, who are only being coddled and shown that if their mother could do it alone, then the girlfriend can, too. It will take centuries to undo this damage.


But from one feminine woman to another, these are signs to look out for and avoid these hyper-feminine men at all costs. They are also very tit-for-tat. So don’t think they aren’t keeping a mental note of everything they do for you only to throw it back at you when they’re angry. It’s a losing battle. But there are still masculine men out there! So if you’re a woman with high standards and looking for a masculine man, keep looking, you’ll find him. The thing is, he may not be on dating apps and social media, so you’ll have to go outside.

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