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He Doesn't Express His Feelings For Me

by Jeanine Dorrough

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels

Men are incapable of reading women’s minds. Not expressing his feelings for you is not always a red flag. Sometimes they simply don’t realize they are doing something wrong. Dense is the word I am looking for. Men can be dense. They need your help when it comes to these things. Make it clear to him what you want from him and you might discover that things will start to look up.


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One of the worst things that can come out of these situations is that you will end a real relationship with a genuinely good guy. Some people can feel incredibly deeply and still struggle with expressing that love regularly. So, don’t tear apart something good without trying to fix the problem first. The problem here is that men think if there’s no crying or fighting then everything must be fine. Men will not realize that they are not doing something if no one tells them there is a problem.



First things first, are you being hypocritical? Get real with yourself. Have you explicitly expressed how you feel? While we are guilty of it, we cannot expect our men to pick up on our message through intense eye contact and transmitted thoughts. You can’t expect him to know that you want him to be more expressive if you are not expressing yourself as well. Help him along and explain it to him.


He is very likely unassuming and innocent. Men tend to think that things are fine as long as no one is making the problems obvious. If you have an issue with his lack of expression, then you have a problem with communication. The only way to fix a communication issue is to communicate through it. Sit him down and tell him what you would like him to fix.


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Clear expectations are incredibly important in all aspects of a relationship. So, as many times as I have already said it, tell him what it is that you have a problem with. You cannot simply tell him that you want him to express his feelings for you more often. You need to let him know what it is you mean when you say that. Do you want him to listen better, take you on more dates, buy you presents, or perhaps you want daily back rubs? Whatever it is that you need from him, you need to make it clear so that he knows what course of action to take. Otherwise, he might completely misunderstand you and not correct his behavior.


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However, if you take the proper steps of explanation, and he disregards it, leave him. It may seem like a dramatic reaction initially, but in reality, if you are nicely asking him to help you achieve happiness in your relationship, he should respect that. If he cannot give you the effort and respect that you deserve, and he cannot adjust his behavior then you shouldn’t waste your time on him.

It is your man’s responsibility to make sure he enhances your happiness. It is your responsibility to do the same for him. Expressing your feelings for each other, setting clear expectations, and respecting each other are major aspects of a healthy and happy relationship. If he cannot respect you or try his hardest to make you happy, then you are not in the kind of relationship that should last. Granted, all men can be a bit obtuse at times. It is okay if you need to remind them every once in a while, but if he never truly listened to your initial plea then he sucks.



Everyone deserves someone who will make them happy; someone who will make you feel so completely loved that you never doubt each other. No one is immediately and easily perfect, so it is normal to take a while to reach the point where you can sit him down to tell him that you want more attention. So, if you have tried reminding him to be more expressive towards you and he has not put in any effort, then you need to pull all of your efforts out and find yourself a man who is ready to love you how you want to be loved.


At the end of the day, we all deserve someone willing to try their hardest for us. If you discover that you are not getting that from someone, it may be time for you to recognize that you deserve better. If you’re in a relationship, you should go to bed at night feeling loved. That’s what relationships are about: companionship, love, and happiness. If they are not mature or caring enough to let you know how they feel about you after you have asked them to, then it’s time for you to find someone that will.


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