top of page

Black Men and Broken Homes: Bhad Bhabie Announces Pregnancy

by Danielle Wright

Yesterday, on December 1st, rapper Bhad Bhabie announced her pregnancy with her longtime boyfriend, rapper La Vaughn.

Image Credit: Jason Koerner / Getty Images

The now 26-year-old first rose to fame in 2016 at the age of 13 after a dispute with Dr. Phil McGraw on an episode of his eponymous daytime talk show. Welcomed by members of both the Black and Hispanic American communities, Bhad Bhabie has since experienced an exorbitant amount of success. While the rapper has managed to remain unproblematic for the most part, social media users flooded the comments under The Shade Room post yesterday, citing things like: "Now she's got a mixed baby to say she’s Black."

"Single mother loading in 5…4…3…2…1…"

"She can’t be black, so she made sure to get that Black baby."

"A lot of baby mommas, not enough wives!"

"Good, let’s change the face of baby mommaism."

"I knew it was someone Black."

Dear Black Men, the world is watching. Last fall, a trend on TikTok began making its rounds, with one in particular standing out: the video caption read, “Tell me you’re a Black man, without telling me,” and a Caucasian gentleman proceeded to walk around his home, showing his family and then leaving to “get some milk” and never returning.

Thereby indicating that Black men do not stay in the lives of the children they help to create. This pattern of behavior has grown so popular that Black women and some other Black men are calling it out—the comments on posts by The Shade Room and The Neighborhood Talk are evidence of this. But why does this continue to happen, and is it only on social media?

As a college graduate, many of the Black men I went to school with are now married with families and live in beautiful homes, so why is that not talked about? Since when did the Black man become the poster child for broken homes and creating baby mommas? The truth is, Black men have always been known to create broken homes.

If you’re Black and reading this, ask yourself, where is your dad? Is he in your life? Do you have a relationship with him? If the answer is yes, unfortunately, you should consider yourself lucky. Black men have taken notice of this too, with many of them saying things like, “You can tell when a girl has her father in her life, versus when they don’t.” I once dated a guy who explained this to me as well. Interestingly enough, he had a 3-year-old daughter; therefore, her mother is a single mom—broken home created.

The African American population in the United States is 41.6 million as of 2020, with the highest number of Black married couples reaching 5,089, in comparison to White married couples at 42,910. But what if the marriage rates in the African American community rose to those numbers? Would it then change the narrative that Black men are just unresourceful thugs who do nothing but create broken homes?

If you take a Black marble and toss it into a pool of 50,000 red marbles, you may stand a chance at finding it. However, toss it into a pool of 250,000 marbles, and it will be as good as lost. My point is, we see the lack of a family structure in the Black community because it’s so small in comparison to, let’s say, the Caucasian community. There are cracks in both, but we cannot see them in both.

It’s disheartening to see the broken homes created in the African American community, and to further expand on this is the lack of married Black women. So, while a handful of Black men may be getting married, they are not marrying Black women, perhaps opting for a biracial Black woman or Hispanic woman—another cause of concern which rose in the comments of those urban blogs via Instagram.

Unfortunately, it would seem that both Black men and women are under attack by the media, but we have yet to acknowledge it. I talked about the Erosion of the Black Woman’s Image in another article and how a lack of respect for the Black man is widening the wealth gap between them and their counterparts.

If the people who employ our basketball players, rappers, and business owners (like Yeezy) prefer to see them with non-Black women, doesn’t that further push the narrative that Black women are not wife material? Especially to wealthy men. This is not a matter of insecurity; it’s a matter of calling out what is right in front of us.

Our community is being forcibly destroyed, but why is it so easy for them to do so? Not to mention women like Summer Walker, Yung Miami, Joie Chavis, and more, who are okay with procreating with men publicly but not making it known that they want to be wives first.

It's understandable that many would presume the solution to be dating outside of your race, aka Black women venturing out to Asian American, Hispanic, and Caucasian men. The only downside to that is their options will then increase. All in all, increasing their options will only make it harder for them to value a mate outside of their race, which may then soon result in the same outcome—Black women being passed over.

Related articles: Dating Someone With a Kid

The community is in shambles, and the solution is not venturing out; it’s fixing our house first. We need to stop demonizing marriage, especially when it’s a Black couple. Comments like, “Maybe she doesn’t want to be married.”

“Marriage isn’t for everyone.”

“Stop forcing marriage down everyone’s throats.”

The thought process should now be, if you want children, then you want marriage. There cannot be one without the other. As simple as that.

Black mothers need to raise their sons to be husbands, not just men. Raise your sons with the idea that he will one day have a family of his own, and ask yourself, should the world have another him? Should the woman he marries carry on his legacy? Your child is a reflection of you.

We must also be consciously aware of our behavior when we do see Black couples get married. It’s unfortunate that when shared online, the comments refer to the man as being "zesty" or "sassy" and are always met with scrutiny and malicious comments. However, when articles are posted about the wedding of Sofia Richie and husband, Elliot Grainge, the comments are uplifting, positive, and kind, the same for Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker. We are easy to break from the outside because we’re not strong as a community.

Related articles: Why is Dating So Hard

Related articles: Dating Someone With a Kid

Black men are creating broken homes, and when Black women stop allowing it, they will, of course, take this pattern of behavior elsewhere, which we can now see is playing out before our eyes. But where does that leave the community? Where will that leave Black people as a race a few years from now?

Dear Black Men, the world is watching.


bottom of page